Author Topic: Perverted Wishes (Read 104621 times)

xXStarlightXx · « **Reply #900 on:** August 26, 2008, 09:41:21 PM »

You do but now night time is only one hour long. Have fun.

I wish I could make love for hours and not get tired.

Inkidu · « **Reply #901 on:** August 26, 2008, 11:15:31 PM »

Granted but your lover has no such boon and gets tired of the constant sex, and the damaged it does to his man parts. He soon leaves you.

I wish I had a legal, legit copy of Bully: Scholarship Edition for the Xbox 360.

jstarz · « **Reply #902 on:** August 27, 2008, 10:02:14 AM »

Granted, but a moral panic develops around that game and it is seized by "concerned parents" and burned.

I wish stadium popcorn wasn't so buttery and salty.

Paradox · « **Reply #903 on:** August 27, 2008, 10:06:22 AM »

Granted, but you suck at life.

I wish humans didn't have to sleep a full eight hours to achieve the benefits of a good night's rest.

dart · « **Reply #904 on:** August 27, 2008, 12:44:36 PM »

granted. some humans can now sustain themselves with only four hours of sleep...(myself included)

I wish I could finally figure out how to finish one of my 7 story's.

Paradox · « **Reply #905 on:** August 27, 2008, 01:09:50 PM »

(How was that a perversion of my wish? All you did was grant it. You have to modify it so that it isn't a good thing.)

MusicNeverDies · « **Reply #906 on:** August 27, 2008, 01:14:31 PM »

Quote from: Paradox on August 27, 2008, 01:09:50 PM

(How was that a perversion of my wish? All you did was grant it. You have to modify it so that it isn't a good thing.)

(I think he means some can- but not you. )

Paradox · « **Reply #907 on:** August 27, 2008, 01:36:58 PM »

*drools over Music's post number*

Mmmm...same upside down as it is right side up...

*ahem* I concede your point; still, it's not all that perverted.

Idej · « **Reply #908 on:** August 29, 2008, 01:12:00 AM »

I'll grant two wishes all in one post.

Granted, humans can now sleep for four hours instead of one, but their lifespans are now cut in half since their number of hours of sleep has been cut in half.

Granted, you finish one of your stories, but the ending is so horrible, that anyone who reads has the urge to maim you for how lame the ending is.

I wish for eternal youth.

CaptainErotica · « **Reply #909 on:** August 29, 2008, 06:16:42 AM »

Granted. You remain young and healthy for all eternity while everyone you ever love or care grows old and dies.

I wish for World Peace.

Inkidu · « **Reply #910 on:** August 29, 2008, 07:01:15 AM »

Granted for one glorious day all the nations and peoples of the world come together in perfect harmony.
The next day North Korea says something about Syria's mother and World War III erupts.

I wish I could by the world a coke.

Paradox · « **Reply #911 on:** August 29, 2008, 07:06:22 AM »

Quote from: Inkidu on August 29, 2008, 07:01:15 AM

Granted for one glorious day all the nations and peoples of the world come together in perfect harmony.
The next day North Korea says something about Syria's mother and World War III erupts.

I wish I could by the world a coke.

Hahahahahah.

Granted, but you can't find a straw large enough for the world to snort it with.

I wish I had a paintbrush that could paint things into reality.

MusicNeverDies · « **Reply #912 on:** August 29, 2008, 07:09:59 AM »

Granted, but once they leave the page they instantly melt into mush.

I wish that I could control time.

Inkidu · « **Reply #913 on:** August 29, 2008, 07:33:40 AM »

Granted but you instantly create a paradox and destroy all of existence.

I wish I won a legal and legitimate PS3. Because there no way I'm forking over the money to actually buy one.

jstarz · « **Reply #914 on:** August 29, 2008, 08:21:56 AM »

Granted but as soon as its delivered Sony announces a mandatory product recall of all PS3s.

I wish Tyrod Taylor wasn't going to be redshirted this year.

CaptainErotica · « **Reply #915 on:** August 29, 2008, 08:47:16 AM »

Granted...whoever he is, but he will be playing for your teams arc rival.

I wish Love was a 5 letter word.

Kalen · « **Reply #916 on:** August 29, 2008, 11:44:58 AM »

You discover that it is, but you're forced to speak french for the rest of eternity.

I wish that I had a sidekick!

MusicNeverDies · « **Reply #917 on:** August 29, 2008, 11:46:35 AM »

Granted, but he won't stop trying to get in your pants.

I wish I could watch that.

Paradox · « **Reply #918 on:** August 29, 2008, 11:46:49 AM »

Quote from: Kalen on August 29, 2008, 11:44:58 AM

You discover that it is, but you're forced to speak french for the rest of eternity.

Kalen, even for a perverted wish, that's just sick.

Inkidu · « **Reply #919 on:** August 29, 2008, 05:25:42 PM »

Granted. It comes out on DVD as the hottest thing since sliced bread. Unfortunately the sidekick believes this is defamation of his character and sues everyone who bought the DVD. You are now in debt of roughly two million dollars.

I wish, I wish I was a fish.

CaptainErotica · « **Reply #920 on:** August 29, 2008, 09:29:25 PM »

Granted. You are now a giant Bass, but wait! Is that a juicy looking worm floating on the surface?

I want to be a Chip N Dale

Paradox · « **Reply #921 on:** August 29, 2008, 09:33:49 PM »

Granted. Now you have split personalities. One is named Chip, the other is named Dale.

Oh, did you mean chippendale? Too late!

I wish my ink cartridges never ran out.

CaptainErotica · « **Reply #922 on:** August 29, 2008, 09:38:12 PM »

Granted, but you have to pay $15/ month to use it.

I wish my desktop was working.

MusicNeverDies · « **Reply #923 on:** August 29, 2008, 09:43:03 PM »

Granted, but it gets repossessed.

I wish Disney hadn't warped my perception of relationships.

jstarz · « **Reply #924 on:** August 29, 2008, 09:47:17 PM »

Granted, but now Disney movies routinely feature apathy, heartbreak, neglect, and teach kids a general cynicism towards life. I hope you're happy.

I wish the next poster gets abducted by aliens.