Corrupt a wish

[CupofJoe]

Granted; but you're trapped in eternal sleep.

I wish I was actually good looking.

[Trigon]

Granted, you have been transformed into a face on a paper magazine.

I wish I was a secret agent.

[Hob]

Granted, you have been transformed into a face on a paper magazine.

I wish I was a secret agent.

Granted: You are. But it's so secret that you don't even know it.

I wish I was in the same physical shape I was twenty years ago.

[CassieBear]

Granted, but now you have to work at it ten times as hard.

I wish I could take back everything I said that night.

[al3xzaytev]

Granted, but everyone remembers it.

I wish I can be the Soviet Union's new leader.

[Hawk]

Granted but now you're about to be assassinated

I wish I had a million dollars.

[Trigon]

Granted, you have a million dollars worth of nuclear waste, and no one wants to buy it from you.

I wish I could have anything I wanted

[CassieBear]

Granted. You want nothing for the rest of your life.

I wish my foot would heal.

[letsxflyy]

Granted, but you grow an extra toe.

I wish I was an actress in an Oscar nominated film.

[CassieBear]

Granted. You're the obscure cleaning lady who trips down the stairs and did all your own stunts.

I wish that things go smoothly this time around.

[William Blake]

Granted, although it goes smoothly due to your lack of inclusion

I wish I could get my house to be the right temperature. Ever.

[Trigon]

Granted, it's the right temperature for Venus  >:)

I wish nothing bad would ever happen.

[letsxflyy]

Granted. Nothing bad will ever happen to your dog, but you have the worst luck.

I wish for a calm, relaxing day at the beach.

[William Blake]

Granted. My original idea was perhaps a bit too political, and a bit too on-the-nose. Shame. Straying from that, it's a calm, relaxing day on the beach for the little sand crabs, as the beach is closed and no meddling humans are allowed to tromp about and harass them.

I wish I wasn't compelled to be so long winded.

[Stone]

Granted. Your vocabulary now consists of two words: The Tyger.

I wish I was the moon tonight.

[William Blake]

Tyger The.

I kid; your wish is granted. The moon in the sky disappears, and in a *poof* of catastrophic proportions, you transform into the new mood. On the surface of Earth. The effects of your proximity to the surface (touching it, in case that wasn't immediately obvious) are cataclysmic and your wish is widely hailed as the greatest disaster of the new millennium. Congrats.

I wish I could go home early.

[Phantomhive]

Granted, however, you were fired before hand.

I hope/wish my mystery cosplay exceeds all expectations

[teleri]

Granted, but everyone else cosplaying where your cosplaying is wearing the exact same costume almost to the smallest detail. It's hard when there's 1000 Princess Leias in chainmail bikinis and yet, there you are, surfing that crazy wave.

I wish the summer would hurry up and get done already.

[strynxode]

Granted, but since time travel is too expensive, you just got possessed by some random spirit so that it would go through summer in your stead, at the end there will be plenty of evidence that this spirit had fun indulging in all kind of activities you wouldn’t be proud of, have fun dealing with the consequences of everything you didn’t do.

I wish for a new keyboard (the musical instrument, not the one used to write).

[William Blake]

Granted, but it appears in front of you... and over your hands while you type. Its fall breaks your fingers, and the doctors aren't sure you'll ever play again.

I wish I'd gotten my O/O page done today.

[Trigon]

Granted, it's a blank page.

I wish I was a ghost

[letsxflyy]

Granted. You are now a ghost that can not touch, talk to, or otherwise interact with anything. You are now forever a  lonely ghost.

I wish for snow in summer.

[al3xzaytev]

Granted, but the world is f**ked up.

I wish communism dominates the world.

[Ace Shotwell]

Granted, but communism becomes so government corrupted that the world's economic infrastructure collapses

I wish that i could get a decent nights sleep tonight.

[William Blake]

Granted. The sleep is so wonderful that you decide to stay in it; you never wake up again.

I wish I had a good snack.