Corrupt a wish

Started by Twilightfiredragon, October 04, 2011, 02:08:49 PM

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Galanthor

Granted. *spills it over you* Why didn't you ask for wax? that would have been more fun

Wish for a massage

Divine Drivel

Granted: Here's a retired sumo wrestler with palms bigger than Canada.

I wish I have a jet plane.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Galanthor

Granted, it's a palmed sized toy though

I wish i was more charming

Divine Drivel

Granted: You are now Prince Charming to Shrek's daughter.

I wish I'm taller.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Galanthor

Granted, now you must fight godzilla though, also sex will be hard

I wish i could dance

Divine Drivel

Granted: You're now Fred Astaire . But Ginger isn't a girl. It's a root crop.

I wish I have a personal chef.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

DeadCell

Granted: but he only cooks insects...

I wish I could fly

ONS AND OFFS / Click Me For Story Ideas /
What is the colour of night?

Divine Drivel

Granted: You can fly .. really, really high. And then you realized you are deathly afraid of heights and plummeted to the ground. Tsk.

I wish I could meet beat Chuck Norris.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Adammair

Granted. You get the fight of your life from him, when you deliver your finishing blow, the dreaded two-finger eye poke in the style of the Three Stooges. This also leaves Chuck blind in both eyes and furious, so when he gets his hands on you, he kills you, because...well, he's Chuck Norris. ;D

I wish to have a jackpot-winning lottery ticket in my possession right now, and to be able to keep possession of it, in secret, until I redeem it at the local lottery office.

Belle33

Congratulations Adam!  You're a winner!  Unfortunately, there are 200,000 others with the same winning numbers - what are the odds of that? -  and your cut turns out to be $50.  Even more unfortunately, there's a a minimum tax of $10,000 on all winners when the jackpot is $1 million or more.  So, you might not want to cash that ticket in after all.

I wish I could have free shipping on everything I ever order online for the rest of my very long life.

Ons/Offs, Stories & Poems, Currently Not Available for RP

Divine Drivel

*Swishes her wand*

Wish granted! You now have a lifetime free shipping but you went broke from ordering online throughout your lengthy lifespan and you now live on top of moldy crates and boxes crawling with roaches. But hey, you got everything delivered without having to dip inside an empty wallet, right?

I wish to own an Apple Store.

- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Adammair

Granted, but the spirit of Steve Jobs compels me to corrupt this wish, by giving you a store filled with apples, one of which is bad, and you have to find that one apple before it spoils the whole bunch! XD

I wish I knew how to skateboard.

Divine Drivel

Granted in the middle of the Olympic Podium: You are declared the grand slam winner of Skate Boarding Category. Too bad you skidded off a cliff during the last leg of the competition.

I wish I can speak 5 languages.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Adammair

Granted, but you speak them all simultaneously, so that what comes out is completely incomprehensible.

I wish I could have more than one wife, at the same time.

Divine Drivel

Granted! I now pronounce you husband to a eunuch, an aging librarian and Dr. Ruth. Enjoy the honeymoon!

I wish I am Queen.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Adammair

Granted! You are now Freddie Mercury, Brian May, and all the rest of the members of the rock band, Queen.

I wish to be a rock star.

Divine Drivel

Of course your wish is granted! You are now a boulder shaped like a star. Rock on!

I wish I have a butler.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Galanthor

Granted, though...the butler is always the murder

wish i had a bodyguard.

Divine Drivel

Granted! You are now guarded by a burly warden inside Alcatraz.

I wish my neighbor would stop parking on my spot.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Flaming

Granted, your spot is now Tow Away Zone, 24/7

I wish my shoulder would finally heal

Divine Drivel

Granted: Not only did it heal, but you grew a third one, too!

I wish no one would rain in on my parade.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

DeadCell

Granted: But, when your parade starts to happen, every person watching pulls out a hosepipe and starts to drench you and the floats. Also because of all the water a massive tidle wave like the one from the Day After Tomorrow sweeps across town sweeping you and it away. Fuck knows the physics behind it all.

I wish I was a werewolf

ONS AND OFFS / Click Me For Story Ideas /
What is the colour of night?

Divine Drivel

Granted. You're now a werewolf. The plastic kind with batteries.

I wish there's a shoe sale today.
- - - I have random episodes of majestic surliness so I combat this phenomenon by mentally fast forwarding to Fridays - - -

Jalynn6

Granted! But every time you find a great deal they are out of your size and the size on either side of the scale! No shoes for you today!

I wish the ground was accommodating to people who hate shoes and prefer bare feet!

Bloody Rose

Granted: All shoes,sandals,boots and anything that can serve to protect your feet disappears.

I wish there was no guns left in the world.