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Wish granting gone wrong!

Started by Cicerin Glaydel, May 08, 2010, 12:14:15 PM

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Belle33

Well, "really clever" is going to be impossible given the starting point.  But I grant you moderate cleverness...just enough to get you into trouble.

I wish I was blonde rather than brunette.

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boegiboe

Haha whoops I mean I meant to do that *ahem*

Granted, you are now blond! Unfortunately, the stereotypes come with it, and you get forever innocently stuck staring at an orange carton that says 'concentrate'

I wish I could be a better writer

Belle33

*pretends I didn't notice your fall*

Granted, you are now a better writer than a 4 year old.  Congratulations!

I wish (I really do) that I were 4 inches taller than I am.  (I'm 5'4 - is this really so much to ask?)

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Beauty Rapax

 Congratulations. You are now four inches taller. Enjoy the rest of your life with stiletto heels skin grafted to your feet.

I wish I could read minds.

Harley

Granted, but now voices of people's thoughts won't stop talking.  You can't get any sleep or peace. 

I wish Heath Ledger was alive. 

Belle33

Granted, Heath is alive in the hearts of his family, friends, and fans. 

I wish I didn't have a headache. 

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boegiboe

Granted, in a freak accident you lose your head. Now you have severe neck ache and a mess on your floor :[

I wish to be known worldwide for something awesome.

Belle33

Wish granted, we are now married and you are known as the spouse of someone more famous than Oprah.  Unfortunately, we have learned that you cheated and fathered several children out of wedlock - so I'm afraid an ugly divorce is imminent.

I wish I had a more attractive nose.

(be warned - giving me a Michael Jackson nose will not end well for the granter)

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rhev

You now have an absolutely gorgeous nose, unfortunately it's been misplaced and is positioned on the small of your back above your butt.



I wish I could understand what my cat is saying when she meows at me.

boegiboe

Granted, you now understand everything your cat says! Unfortuntely most of the times she is blaring insults at you and about how much she wants to get a new owner.

I wish I didn't wake up this morning with a messed up shoulder, upper back and neck

rhev

Quote from: boegiboe on May 25, 2011, 01:36:48 PM
Granted, you now understand everything your cat says! Unfortuntely most of the times she is blaring insults at you and about how much she wants to get a new owner.

Oh that's not so bad... that's what I assume she's saying most of the time anyways.


Quote from: boegiboe on May 25, 2011, 01:36:48 PM
I wish I didn't wake up this morning with a messed up shoulder, upper back and neck

Granted, now your OTHER shoulder and lower back hurt.

Belle33

You have failed to make a wish - as punishment, I ungrant your wish about your cat - you can no longer understand her and she's also run away.

I wish I could be in two places at the same time.

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boegiboe

Granted, you step on a mine at the border between Iraq and Iran. You are now in several places at one- though not very far apart and in smaller pieces.

I wish I had lovely green eyes

rhev

Granted, they are cold and wet in your hands, and now you have a body to dispose of.

I wish my wife would wake up and make me breakfast.

Belle33

Granted, but she poisoned your drink, and I'm afraidour naughty bits will start to fall off in a few hours.  Sorry.

I wish time would move more quickly today.

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Zaphod

Granted but it can't stop once it starts moving and you will be an old lady tomorrow.  >:)

I wish I didn't have a big assignment to complete today.

rhev

Granted, it was due yesterday, you're already late.


I wish my teeth didn't hurt so much right now.

Belle33

Granted, all your teeth are now gone.  You feel no pain, but you are toothless forever.  Say cheese!

I wish I had a piece of chocolate.

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rhev

Here you go, a nice big chunk of bakers chocolate.  Enjoy the disgusting bitter taste!


I wish my ERP mates would post more often.

Belle33

Granted, your mates post but your characters are unceremoniously killed off and locked.  Too bad, dear.

I wish I could get a good night's sleep.

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boegiboe

Granted, I curl up in bed with you. Unfortunately I leave in the morning and all your other sleeps are bad.

I wish the night could have lasted forever!

Belle33

Granted, cuddles boegiboe forever.  Unfortunately, the economy has reduced the value of forever to two hours at best.  *pouts*

I wish that someone would tell me a funny joke.

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Harley

Granted.  You literally die laughing.   What a way to go...

I wish I could teleport anywhere. 

Belle33

Granted.  But the program is experimental and I'm afraid many of your cells were rearranged in such a way as to cause quite wretched deformaties.  So sorry.

I wish I could invite everyone on E to my place for a huge party.

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Harley

Granted.   Unfortunately, the place has been trashed to hell and back, and the cops pay a nice visit.   

I wish I could get better sleep.