Favorite Not-Dirty Word

[Star Safyre]

I think we all find ourselves in situations where the most natural of reactions is too great for the ears around us.  So sometimes you need to censor yourself.

My phrases of choice when I need to remain somewhat professional around little ears are:

"Oh... expletives!"
"Uh!  Profanity!  Lots of profanity!"
"Sugar ants!"
"Piece of work machine!"

[Silverfyre]

"Prophylactic!"
"Toaster Tacos!"
"By the beard of Obi-Wan!"

[Shjade]

"So that just happened." (Alternatively: "Or that could happen," depending on which suits the context of events better.)

[Beguile's Mistress]

"Now, isn't that special?"  Try it sounding like the Church Lady from SNL. ;D

[Kuroneko]

"I'm just saying"
"Has anyone seen Gloria Estefan lately?"
"Mother pus bucket"
"Gorramit"

But, I really like your "Profanity!  Lots and lots of profanity!" Star.  I'm going to remember that one. ;-)

[Hemingway]

Well, since English isn't my native language, I'll have to translate. But some of them don't really translate very well.

If I hurt myself ( I can sometimes be a little dramatic. ):

"Pain! Indescribable pain!"
"Why!?" or "Why me!?"

The one I generally use to express annoyance or frustration is ... well, it's basically the color black, in adjective form. Normally - that is if I don't have to censor myself - I'll add a "hell" at the end.

[Oniya]

BSG fans will get this one:

Frak.

It amuses me to no end to see it used with regards to toxic and environmentally harmful drilling practices.

[Ryven]

"Like ya do..."
"Farfegnugens!!"
"That just happened."

[HairyHeretic]

I swear in Klingon. It's a wonderful language for swearing, really lets you get oomph into the words, and no one is likely to take offense unless you translate for them. :)

[Oniya]

I swear in Klingon. It's a wonderful language for swearing, really lets you get oomph into the words, and no one is likely to take offense unless you translate for them. :)

Cripes, you can order lunch in Klingon and people will think you're swearing!

[Saerrael]

BSG fans will get this one:

Frak.

It amuses me to no end to see it used with regards to toxic and environmentally harmful drilling practices.

I use that one. too ♥ Only a true nerd uses such a dirty word, eh?
I also use 'fork', and I've used it so much, it basically replaced the more dirty word.

The rest of the cursewords I use are mangled up Dutch curses, so I think I can't really entertain you with those, sorry.

I swear in Klingon. It's a wonderful language for swearing, really lets you get oomph into the words, and no one is likely to take offense unless you translate for them. :)

I have envy written all over my face, right now.

[gaggedLouise]

Having gone all the way to Moscow, with the Tsar and his army retreating before him, Napoleon is supposed to have exclaimed this when he got word that the city around him was burning, set alight by the Russians themselves:

"What an astonishing decision! This is one that couldn't be calculated!"

I read the story of Napoleon's great army in a book Episodes from History when I was a little kid, and ever since I've been using that sort of half-detached line - "This is one that couldn't be calculated!" as a stock comment either, in irony, for things that you could obviously see coming long before they happened, or for when something totally unexpected does happen.

[Iniquitous]

Frickin frak!

Sons of a biscuit eater!

Farfignugen! (seems Ryven and I use the same word!)

Shimmy!

[TheGlyphstone]

When I'm annoyed with someone, I tell them to go defenestrate themselves.

[Beguile's Mistress]

Rattsafrakkinpackaluber!!!!!

[Kuroneko]

I also say, like you do ;)

[HairyHeretic]

Cripes, you can order lunch in Klingon and people will think you're swearing!

No self respecting Klingon lunch is simply going to obey orders. You have to beat it into submission first :) Klingons conquer all that they desire ... including lunch. Why else would it be served live?

[TheGlyphstone]

Klingons eat sushi in Hard Mode.

[Geeklet]

Sonuvacrap.

Also, I tend to say 'shiza' more than I should (still technically a dirty word, just not in english).

[Oniya]

Sonuvacrap.

Also, I tend to say 'shiza' more than I should (still technically a dirty word, just not in english).

A German friend of mine once told me that she used 'Scheibenhonig' (lit. 'slice of honey') in place of Scheiss (lit. - well, you know.)

[Auron]

Impetuous.

Its fun to watch them try and figure it out. (Most people I would say this to aren't very bright)

[Oniya]

Is that like telling them their S.O. is 'pulchritudinous' and letting them 'make' you take it back?

[Auron]

Haha, yes. It is along those likes.

"Your mother is a descendant of simians and higher cognitive brain functions."

[Galactic Druid]

I say this entirely too often at work. Please bear in mind I work with fire.

"Gaaaaah! Mother of Pearl!!"

[NotoriusBEN]

chowder-dirty jokeshttp://youtu.be/aBu_kDW3DOQ

[The Golden Touch]

I usually take a page from Firefly. -shrug-

[BetaBonk]

Fudge-bundles!
Sock-wafflin' Bungie-heimers!
Bonkle-Snifters!

[Immortal Flame]

"By the beard of Obi-Wan!"

Lovin' that Obi-Wan comment! :D

[MasterMischief]

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
--Mark Twain

I like 'poop'.  The sound of it brings levity and makes the situation tolerable.

[Star Safyre]

You gotta love "poop". 

In our house, we gauge how tired we are by how hilarious we find someone saying, as fast as they can, "Pee pee poo poo, poo poo pee pee!"

[Love And Submission]

As an American I just go full on British. "Bloody, Bugger, Wanker, tosser" are all acceptable in polite conversation due to cultural differences which is awesome.

[Koren]

When I'm annoyed with someone, I tell them to go defenestrate themselves.

That is just absolutely brillant. Reminds me of the time we were playing charades and my friend told me to act out defenestrate in the middle of a field and I just looked at him, with the little kids around us and went 'okay... sure.... HOW THE... HOW?!" It was quite funny at the time.

Anyway I usually go for telling someone "You person" instead of 'you bastard' and my most used one of "you'll keep" which apparently seems to be pure australianism so I've heard, as most people I say it to who aren't aussies get highly confused

[Oniya]

We had a song when I was in about fourth grade, where we'd take various nursery rhymes and 'defenestrate' them.  Something like:

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
Along came spider who
Sat down beside her and
She threw it out the window.
The window
The second story window
Along came spider who
Sat down beside her and
She threw it out the window.

(The word 'threw' is hit as strongly as possible, depending on the amount of giggling going on.)

[Star Safyre]

Due to recent vocabulary lessons, I've taken to muttering that people "can go acerbate" themselves.

[MasterMischief]

If you are lucky enough to have an empty chair near by when the need arrises...you can pretend someone else said the word.   ;D

[Mobats]

"Oh my goodness"
"Oh.... sheets"

Those are a few I could think of off the top of my head, but since I do have friends that are major Potter-heads (and yes I am one) I hear the following:

"For the love of Merlin"
"Merlins pants"

[LadyAVA]

Awesome Sauce :)

[Scarletta]

"Holy Trash Cans"
"Son of a binkie"

Then my personal favorite that I've ever done!
"Frick frack fackity wack"

:P

[Avis habilis]

Gorram ruttin' go se!

[LadyAVA]

"didja" lol "didja-eat yet" (did you eat yet?)
Im "Fixin" to lol hehe

[Chelemar]

holy frickafrackenfruckarucken batman, that's a lot of spaghetti!

[Maegnis]

Flakey...
Not even sure what it means exactly but I love saying it.

[Oniya]

Flakey usually means somewhat scatterbrained, like the person who assembles a casserole, puts it in the oven, sets the timer, and forgets to turn the oven on.  (Or turns the oven on and forgets to set the timer!)

[yaracyrrah]

I say "bleep" (or "bleeping").  Also "freaking", usually in the construction "FREAkin' MORons!"

My favorite, though, is "unprintable", which is used by the character Ebling Mis in Asimov's _Foundation_ series.  Alas, I haven't been able to train myself to use it without thinking about it.

[LadyAVA]

What the Sassafrass??

[Oniya]

What the Sassafrass??

Aerosmith fan?

[tazzlez60]

These all made me giggle! I constantly use the following:

-Bugger
-Bum
-"Ah poo"
-"Oh balls...." (not sure if that counts  xD)
-Frick on a stick

and my all time favourite..... FUDGE MUFFINS!!!!

[tozhma]

fizzcuck

[Oniya]

I have, on occasion, used 'fsck' as a cuss word.  Usually, by the time you're using fsck, cussing is implied.

[SweetKnickers]

"Stupid fruit basket!"
"Go masturbate with a fruit knife, you eggplant."
0___O. I tend to use the word eggplant and fruit as insults and I also like to utter phrases in which people should go and masturbate with sharp things. ::)

[Kahlen]

I usually go...

Mew, Rawr and Moe  :o

[Vanity Evolved]

I usually go...

Mew, Rawr and Moe  :o

Kahlen does enjoy her moe-ing~

Hmm. I does say mew, and rawr a lot. I'd say tits, but that's a little dirty. :3 Father Jack has always inspired a great love in me for the words ecumenical, drink and girls. Drink! Girls! That would be an ecumenical matter!

[Silver]

Conundrum.

[SweetKnickers]

New word! :D I'm really enjoying "blasphemy!" and "gavel".
Heheheh...

[Gizacall]

Bollocks....

[Vanity Evolved]

Anathema is pretty cool, too.

[Madriv]

Churlish. Need to use that one more.

[Rozel]

Fizzlesticks!

:P

[Aleph]

I'm fond of going the Hastings (if you watch the Poirot Mysteries, you'll know what I mean and have likely discussed the drinking game). In short, upper class old fashioned English exclamations.

"I say!"
"the Rotter!"
"my word!"
and so on. You bunch of filthy bounders.

[inMadness]

"I know, right?"
...
Oh, this was Favorite Not-Dirty Word, wasn't it... -- Oops.

[NightRabbit]

"Son of a ducky!!!" <---Used for people I like but am envious of/annoyed at/etc.
"Fuh!" <---I pronounce it "foo" and used for varying degrees of disapproval/disappointment/disagreement.
"Pfui-Nuts!" <---Based on an exchange from one of my favorite books. One character says pfui and the other says nuts in response.
"Super Official." <---I watch Daym Drops. The phrase is now used whenever I cook something beyond delicious and beautiful. :P
"It's so serious, it's super cereal." <---I...don't know. I'm just weird. XD

[TheGlyphstone]

Telling people you masticate at least three times every day is fun.

[Mister Grimm]

"Stars and stones"
"Hell's Bells"
"Empty Night"


Those are some of my favorites. Oh Dresden Files.

[Lux12]

Stygian is very close contender.

[Spynmaster]

Shell


As in, "What the shell?!"


From TMNT(2003 animated series).


Here's a funny thought: Shit + Hell = Shell.


;)

[Saidi]

Usually it's something like "Well fudge"

Then there are times I start swearing a la "wheel of time" hehehe

Oh and I do tend to say "That sucks monkey toes!"

[DudelRok]

If people are getting on my nerves I'll point at them, squint my eyes and say. "No. Bad. Stop." Basically I treat them like if my dog had just done something I disproved of. Otherwise you'll find me muttering nonsensicals, like I was Yosemite Sam.

[Darkfold]

"For the love of a sadist!"

[EMO]

In a word, "madness.". In two words, "hello nobody."

[Remiel]

I like to quote Kefka from Final Fantasy 3 (or FFVI, if you want to be precise):

"Son of a submariner!"

Also, there's "Jesus Christ on a pogo stick!" which, while being sacreligious, is more absurd than profane.

[Slywyn]

My favorite word to get a reaction with in school was to be in a fairly quiet area(like the library) and stand or sit somewhere just out of sight, but where you could still see your subjects(a corner of the shelves worked well).

Then, you say just loud enough for everyone to hear, "moist".

And watch people cringe.

A saying I inherited from my mom though is "Suck a duck!"

It's fun.

[Deamonbane]

Oh... Schmidt

[Slywyn]

When I'm trying to get someone's attention(or just check if they're even there) on an IM like YIM or Skype, I'll say any variation/combination of mew, rawr, rar, arr, mem, wem, boop, boob, boo, or sometimes *poke*

[Geeklet]

When I'm trying to get someone's attention(or just check if they're even there) on an IM like YIM or Skype, I'll say any variation/combination of mew, rawr, rar, arr, mem, wem, boop, boob, boo, or sometimes *poke*

Heh, usually I do something similar when joining the IRC channel. Its either Rawr, Tada, or Huzzah.

[Skynet]

Loquacious.  Love the way it rolls off the tongue.

[Songbird]

I have a new favorite word almost every day! ;D Lately my favorites have been Ardent, Thoroughly, Alliteration, Phylactery, Anonymous, and Bibliotheque (French for Library). :-)

Isn't Bibliotheque an awesome word? It sounds like a disco-tech in a library! :D

[Slywyn]

Well the spanish version of the same word(If what I remember is correct) is biblioteca(or teka? I don't remember, only the sound).

Maybe they had similar origins.

[Songbird]

Well the spanish version of the same word(If what I remember is correct) is biblioteca(or teka? I don't remember, only the sound).

Maybe they had similar origins.

They are both romance languages, so it's quite possible! :D

[Songbird]

Ooo! I have a new favorite! :D "Pugnacious"! ;D

[MadnessChi1d]

"Got Bam!"
"Fruit juice!"
"Mother Trucker!" (My mom was literally a trucker.)

[BlissfulBoi]

"Got Bam!"
"Fruit juice!"
"Mother Trucker!" (My mom was literally a trucker.)

"Definetly Mother Trucker."

[Oniya]

"Got Bam!"

Emeril?  Is that you?

[sq4096]

Having spent many a night sitting up with the non-sleeping monkey on weekends, my new favorite word to use is "Spoilers" but with that really big smile and kinda insinuating something else.  Bet you can't guess what we have been watching at 3am.

[MadnessChi1d]

Emeril?  Is that you?

Sorry I don't know an Emeril.

[Oniya]

Merely a bit of fun - Emeril Lagasse is a famous chef who uses the catch phrase 'Bam!' when he seasons food in front of an audience.

[Mithlomwen]

Not sure why, but I've always thought the word 'behoove' was pretty nifty. 

[Songbird]

Wigwam. :-) Don't ask me why, but for some reason I think wigwam sounds like it should be slang term for something naughty. ;D

[Slywyn]

Merely a bit of fun - Emeril Lagasse is a famous chef who uses the catch phrase 'Bam!' when he seasons food in front of an audience.

Actually he's stopped doing this for the most part. He'll use it now and again but he seems to be 'branching out'.

Other phrases that I know of are "Kick it up a notch!" and, uh... well, I forgot the other one. >>

[Songbird]

Not sure why, but I've always thought the word 'behoove' was pretty nifty.

Isn't it a great word? It makes the English major in me giddy! :D

[Castiel]

Having spent many a night sitting up with the non-sleeping monkey on weekends, my new favorite word to use is "Spoilers" but with that really big smile and kinda insinuating something else.  Bet you can't guess what we have been watching at 3am.

Its always fun to watch Dr Who at 3am...
>_>

OT:
"awesome opposum on a stick" is one we used in high school.
I do say "frak" and "shiny" a lot as well.

I also find myself saying "Come along (insert last name of person here)"

[Love And Submission]

Fan-smegging-Tastic

[Grayven]

"SWEET MONKEY ON RYE!" :o

[Spynmaster]

"...I have to save my ass."


-Shrek, referring to saving Donkey.

[Sasquatch421]

Oh monkey poop.....I was going through a Xander phase and heard him say it while playing that one Buffy video game on the PS2. So I started using it when I couldn't swear around someone.

[Songbird]

Subjugate is a pretty fun word to say. ;D

[ebpohmr]

My favourite non-dirty word is: moist. Mostly because of how ridiculously long you can stretch out the oi syllable for. Also because if you say mooooist in a slightly deeper voice than usual, it just sounds dirty. ;)

As for cussing politely, I find 'Ye Cloth-Eared Wazzock!' to be of particular frequent usage...

[SapphireStar]

Do these count?


"Oh, Fudge."

"Great Gobblelygook."

"Great Caesar's Ghost." (Gotta love Perry White)

"Shut the Front Door."

"Sithspawn."

"Bantha Podo."

[Sabine]

I am the queen of substitute curse words, because I don't actually curse. *laughs*

A few of my substitutes:

"Mibs!" *thats my fav LOL

"Dag nabbit!"

"Sufferin' succotash" (Yes, I do say this ^_^)

"Shimata!" (Japanese for, oh dear, shoot...)

"Freakin freak freak"

"Wha' the frap?!"

"Motor scooter!" (or Motor scootin, if I'm describing something)

...those are just the few I can think of off of the top of my head LOL

My actual "favorite" words: in English, Recalcitrant.  Japanese, Kurikaeshimasu ("repeat", I just like the way it flows :D) French, erre (the letter R).

[LilyRoseBlack23]

Hmmmm.....

"What the frack"
"Go noodle yourself"
"Go to Hades"

[Aleph]

Favorite words

Zymurgy (Beer brewing)
Defenestration (To throw something out a window)
Zeugma (The use of a word in two or more different contexts in the same sentence "I took her out, her heart and her hand in marriage")
Iamb (A metric foot in poetry consisting of a short syllable followed by a long one. For example. Iamb)

[Songbird]

"Archaic" has been popping up in my head lately. :-)

[Alchemistry]

"Frosted nuts." Sounds dirty, but it's not.

[Rex Pacis]

"Damnation"

"Aw....fiddlesticks."

"You need to do a lot more shutting the hell up."

"Gwaps." A play on the urban Guap for broke people. Such as..."Yea man I can go. Just gotta get mah gwaps." Has also been likened to a nasty STD in some circles. Such as..."I got the mean gwaps right now." xD

[Thesunmaid]

If i need to sort of say something because I am shocked when the little person is around I say"sweet zombie jesus! or sweet crispy walnuts! they don't quite express the full spectrum but I am also partial to "merde!" which is shit in french. Most people have no idea what your saying but you get to cuss a bit. Being part french I sometimes will start cussing in french so yes...those are mine.

I also like the words "squee and meep" they makes me smile for some reason

[Purpitypurps]

Frickin frak!

Sons of a biscuit eater!

Farfignugen! (seems Ryven and I use the same word!)

Shimmy!

You got a variation of what I use. Mine are
"Son of a biscuit"
"BULL own eeeeee"
If I ever let the word shit get out of my mouth i cover it up as best I can with "SHIITake mushrooms are awesome!"