Perverb Parodies

Started by Oreo, January 13, 2016, 05:56:21 PM

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Oreo



What perverb can you create?

This one has been twisted in my mind since I was a kid. I always got it mixed up with the proper one.

Nature is the mother of invention.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

AmberStarfire

You cannot wake a person who is pretending to be asleep, so let sleeping dogs lie.


Beguile's Mistress

My silver lining almost always has a cloud.

Oreo

I don't give a hill of beans for all the tea in China.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

Oreo

Tossing a grain of salt over ones shoulder might hit an early bird in the eye.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

Yukina

When life gives you lemons, discard them and ask why it didn't give you better fruit.


Oreo

OhMahGerd, after that I have to quote BeMi's custom title:

Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

AmberStarfire

If you don't know where you're going, tell me; I forget.

Where there is love, turn your face to the sun.



RampantDesires

Too many cooks spoil the cake you can't have.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

Chi

Turn the other cheek, then fart really loudly
~~~ Language is my canvas, and words are my palette. Wanna finger paint?  ~~~

Oreo

Looking a gift horse in the mouth may result in getting the hand that does the feeding bit.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

Rhedyn

Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side because it's fake.

Chi

If the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, beware of lots of bullsquat
~~~ Language is my canvas, and words are my palette. Wanna finger paint?  ~~~

RampantDesires

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

Deamonbane

If life hands you lemons, you'd better have some sugar and water, else your lemonade is gonna suck.
Angry Sex: Because it's Impolite to say," You pissed me off so much I wanna fuck your brains out..."

HannibalBarca

#15
Haste makes good things come to he who hesitates like the present.

(So many conflicting proverbs about doing things now and being patient!)

Two heads are better than the other side of the hill...but you can't get the early bird to drink.

A stitch in time saves your balls hanging out of your pants.

Necessity is the mother of some dumb bastard.

If you want something done right, discretion is the better part of another man's treasure.

All good things must bite the hand that's mightier than the sword.

Fortune favors the people who live in glass houses.
“Those who lack drama in their
lives strive to invent it.”   ― Terry Masters
"It is only when we place hurdles too high to jump
before our characters, that they learn how to fly."  --  Me
Owed/current posts
Sigs by Ritsu

MelisaArtemis

Why finish it now if you can just finish it tommorrow instead?

There is limit to brilliance, but there is no limit to stupidity

HannibalBarca

Do unto others, as all's fair in love and war.
“Those who lack drama in their
lives strive to invent it.”   ― Terry Masters
"It is only when we place hurdles too high to jump
before our characters, that they learn how to fly."  --  Me
Owed/current posts
Sigs by Ritsu

Miscellany

Time only makes old wounds hurt more.

You see there's no real ending , this is only the beginning. Come Out And Play.

RampantDesires

When the going gets tough do as the Romans do.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

HannibalBarca

#20
(Would that be conquer everyone, then have a massive orgy afterwards?)

If life gives you lemons, punch it in the dick until it surrenders.
“Those who lack drama in their
lives strive to invent it.”   ― Terry Masters
"It is only when we place hurdles too high to jump
before our characters, that they learn how to fly."  --  Me
Owed/current posts
Sigs by Ritsu

Miscellany

Let the chips fall where they can easily be cleaned up.

You see there's no real ending , this is only the beginning. Come Out And Play.

HannibalBarca

Too many cooks fuck things up like nobody's business.
“Those who lack drama in their
lives strive to invent it.”   ― Terry Masters
"It is only when we place hurdles too high to jump
before our characters, that they learn how to fly."  --  Me
Owed/current posts
Sigs by Ritsu

Miscellany

A problem shared, is a problem that annoys more than one person.

You see there's no real ending , this is only the beginning. Come Out And Play.

RampantDesires

Two heads are better than one, but only as strong as the weakest link.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

Miscellany

Where there is a will ,  there is a family argument.

You see there's no real ending , this is only the beginning. Come Out And Play.

HannibalBarca

If at first you don't succeed, nuke 'em from orbit.
“Those who lack drama in their
lives strive to invent it.”   ― Terry Masters
"It is only when we place hurdles too high to jump
before our characters, that they learn how to fly."  --  Me
Owed/current posts
Sigs by Ritsu

Miscellany

What goes up,  must be able to fly.

You see there's no real ending , this is only the beginning. Come Out And Play.

Oreo

A good man is hard to find, except by a friend in need.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

gaggedLouise

A good man is hard to find, but a hard man is very good to find.  :P

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

Oreo

A man with a hammer sees every problem as an opportunity knocking.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

gaggedLouise

You'll only grasp what a hammer really is when it's broken into pieces

(attributed to philosopher Martin Heidegger)

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

dblkrose

She said she would always be there to pick up the pieces... she didn't tell me she would be the one breaking everything.
"Why do Roses have Thorns... to remind you that somethings, no matter how beautiful, are not to be touched without a little sacrifice..."

-D

RampantDesires

The squeaky wheel gets the grease, but not if its on a cart in front of a horse.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

gaggedLouise

The tooth of time, that cureth every wound, shall gather no rolling moss.  ::)

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

gaggedLouise

The early bird knows how to dig into the loophole.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

a stitch in time favors the bold
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

Beware of the Day of Doom, when people will go down into their graves up in smoke.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

when the going gets tough, the squeaky wheel gets the grease
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

A man's gotta do what he shoots from the hip.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

hope for the best but don't throw stones
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

Empty barrels make the most rumble, but a man in a barrel going down Niagara Falls will silence the crowd...

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

god helps those who help themselves, so you can't always get what you want
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

When the cop pooped in the woods it came as no surprise to the bear.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

if it ain't broke, spoil the broth
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

RampantDesires

When the cat's away he's probably leading a horse to water.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

gaggedLouise

#46
Walk a mile in my skirt and heels, she said, and you will learn how to watch your steps.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

beggers can't be an island
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

A cleavage is the only thing that you can both look up to and look down upon

(ironic caption for a party pic snapped at a student ball in my college days. The picture showed two not very tall girls in party dresses flanked by two considerably taller guys in tail suits)

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

don't bite the hand that speaks louder than words
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

The cat on the rat, the rat on the rope and the rope was bought by the last capitalist.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

the pen is mightier than a free lunch
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

If you can see the pink elephant in the porcelain store, make sure you don't get trampled by it.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

beauty is the mother of invention
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

Never trust a black cat when it crosses the street to direct the traffic.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

the journey of a thousand miles is a dangerous thing
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

He who wears a royal crown must make sure that everyone else is one head shorter.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

don't talk the talk if you can't walk a mile in his shoes
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

When in Rome it is no place like home.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

blood is thick as thieves
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

whimsy

blood as thick as thieves whoops
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

Cleanliness is next to godliness, therefore the pope s**ts in the woods.  :P

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

genius is 1% inspiration and 99% crying over spilled milk
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

The good captain follows his sinking ship down riding a submarine.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

you can't get blood from a rolling stone
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

God helps the man who remembers to pay before you pray.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

whimsy

judge not lest ye be judged for there's no such thing as bad publicity
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

Derwaysh

A squeaky wheel gets the grease and a greasy eel gets the squeeze.
And I, methinks, am gone astray
In trackless wastes and lone.


Pleased to meet you, hope you guessed my name! | A peek is worth a thousand words!

A/A

Finals Week: Posting delays of up to 1 week/10 days

whimsy

the more the merrier (but three's a crowd)
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

gaggedLouise

Follow the (shady) money and the rumour of your death might be somewhat exaggerated.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

Derwaysh

Fortune favours the bold... not the italicized or the underlined. 8-)
And I, methinks, am gone astray
In trackless wastes and lone.


Pleased to meet you, hope you guessed my name! | A peek is worth a thousand words!

A/A

Finals Week: Posting delays of up to 1 week/10 days

whimsy

if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all; the customer is always right
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

Ser

When the going gets tough, do as the Romans.

gaggedLouise

Once bitten to your hand, you don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

RampantDesires

Quote from: Derwaysh on June 16, 2016, 01:29:42 AM
Fortune favours the bold... not the italicized or the underlined. 8-)

This made me laugh a little too hard for this early in the morning :P  Well done.

What doesn’t kill you makes you stranger.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

gaggedLouise

Something is happening here, and you don't know what it is till the fat lady sings - and those drinking glasses begin to break.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

Derwaysh

When life gives you lemons the size of melons, its time to migrate away from Chernobyl.
And I, methinks, am gone astray
In trackless wastes and lone.


Pleased to meet you, hope you guessed my name! | A peek is worth a thousand words!

A/A

Finals Week: Posting delays of up to 1 week/10 days

whimsy

no pain, no gain, no rest for the wicked
o/o ⊱ ☯ ⊰ a/a

Derwaysh

When the going gets Trump, the Trump gets going. :'(
And I, methinks, am gone astray
In trackless wastes and lone.


Pleased to meet you, hope you guessed my name! | A peek is worth a thousand words!

A/A

Finals Week: Posting delays of up to 1 week/10 days

gaggedLouise

Quote from: Derwaysh on June 16, 2016, 05:36:46 PM
When the going gets Trump, the Trump gets going. :'(

Too true! :)

When a lady says no, she means: you gotta say yes to another excess!  :P


Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

Derwaysh

I haven't failed yet, just found 99 excuses why Tesla's better and that's okay. Rubles are on his but time's on my side! >:)
And I, methinks, am gone astray
In trackless wastes and lone.


Pleased to meet you, hope you guessed my name! | A peek is worth a thousand words!

A/A

Finals Week: Posting delays of up to 1 week/10 days

gaggedLouise

No true Scotsman would want to break up the United Kingdom, unless you've attempted to have a look under his kilt. 

:P

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

Belle33

The penis is mightier than the sword.

Ons/Offs, Stories & Poems, Currently Not Available for RP

Rummy Tum Tum

Life is what happens when you're busy making lemons.

gaggedLouise

The Devil is in the details, so nail him with a silver hammer instead of a big stick.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

Oreo

A chain is only as strong as the Devil you know.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

Rummy Tum Tum

Life is a box of the ones you love.

RampantDesires

Actions speak louder than birds of a feather flocking together.

They say best men are moulded out of faults, and, for the most part, become much more the better for being a little bad...
Absences 11/10 ≈ BlindfoldsRequests ≈  On's and Offs
<THIS SPACE PRETTIFIED SOON>
Tentatively Open to a few more 1v1's but also come write with me in Grey Matters--->

Kia


Oreo

Don't make a mountain out of meeting your troubles halfway.

She led me to safety in a forest of green, and showed my stale eyes some sights never seen.
She spins magic and moonlight in her meadows and streams, and seeks deep inside me,
and touches my dreams. - Harry Chapin

gaggedLouise

It's hard to be a saint in the city of tricolore halo lights.  ;)

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"

Kia

Better the Devil you know than the mother of invention.

gaggedLouise

When you've taken the Devil into your boat, Captain, you must go down under with the ship.

Good girl but bad  -- Proud sister of the amazing, blackberry-sweet Violet Girl

Sometimes bound and cuntrolled, sometimes free and easy 

"I'm a pretty good cook, I'm sitting on my groceries.
Come up to my kitchen, I'll show you my best recipes"